Poached Eggs and Hardboiled Eggs: Eggs Two Ways, No Yolking

It’s been five days, and the Husband-Elect and I have successfully polished off our haul from last week’s trip to the Farmer’s Market. (Friends helped.) While we appreciated the ground beef, liked the bacon very much, and freakin’ loved the bread, the highlight of our booty (heh) was undoubtedly the carton of eggs. The EGGS. Who knew?

Lemme explain.

Okay, you know how supermarket eggs are? Runny, pale yellow yolks with flimsy whites and shells that break if you look at them the wrong way? Farmer’s market eggs are not like that at all. They have bright orange yolks with a silky, almost syrupy texture. They have substantive whites you can actually bite into. They have thick, brownish shells that seem almost twice as hard as store-bought eggs.

But best of all, they’re not just eggs. They’re EGGS. They taste like the eggs you remember as a kid. Or like regular eggs, turned up to 11. Or like eggs on ‘roids. (Alex Rodregguez?) If supermarket eggs are regular humans, farmer’s market eggs are the X-Men – regular humans, but way better. Like with claws and telekinesis and stuff.

I prepared our EGGS two ways this past weekend: poached and hard-boiled. Neither method uses oil, butter or cream, which cuts down on the fat. And the techniques – one from The Kitchn, the other from Chocolate & Zucchini – are basically foolproof. I’m an idiot when it comes to hardboiling, and Clotilde’s way hasn’t failed me yet. I owe her something in return. Perhaps a really good egg?

I do need to mention: today I learned there may be an issue with pasteurization and farm-fresh eggs. If you’re nervous, you might want to avoid the poaching and skip ahead to hardboiling. Either way, you’ll feel eggscellent in the end. Eggstra special. Eggceptional, even. (Sorry.)

Whirlpool-Style Poached Eggs
Makes 1 serving
Adapted from The Kitchn.

1 egg
1/2 tablespoon salt
1/2 tablespoon white vinegar
Salt and pepper to taste

1) Add 1 quart of water, salt, and vinegar to a medium pot. Bring it to a boil. Drop heat to medium-low and simmer, making sure the bubbles remain pretty low-key. Using a slotted spoon, create a gentle whirlpool in the pot.

2) Get out a teacup and crack your egg into that cup. Very gently, lower the teacup into the whirlpool and set the egg free. It should migrate to the middle of the pot. 

3) Cook the egg 3 1/2 to 4 minutes. (Try not to go over.) Gently remove egg with your slotted spoon, and let some of the water drip back into the pan. Stick egg on plate. Salt and pepper to taste. Eat.

NOTE: If you’re having multiple eggs, I might do this one at a time. Otherwise … collisions. Yolk everywhere. Dogs and cats, living together. Mass hysteria.


Hardboiled Eggs
Makes 1 serving
Adapted from Chocolate & Zucchini.

1 large egg
Salt and pepper to taste

1) Get out a medium pot. Gently place the whole egg in the pot. and "cover with cold water by a 1/2-inch or so." Put it on the stove and turn the heat to medium-high. Once it starts boiling, kill the heat and cover the pot. Do not touch it for 7 minutes. (No more, no less.)

2) While egg is sitting, fill a medium bowl with cold water and a few ice cubes. After 7 minutes, put the egg in the ice bath. Let it sit 3 minutes.

3) This is all from Heidi, and it's genius: "Roll egg lightly on cutting board, hard enough so shell will crack, but not so hard you mangle it." (Why did I never think of this?) Peel your egg. Add some salt and pepper. Serve. To yourself, presumably.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving for Both Dishes
74 calories, 5 g fat, $0.50

Strawberry and Avocado Salad: An Exercise in CAPITAL LETTERS and Fat Reduction

I’m pretty ambivalent about salads. They’re okay, but I’d order almost anything else before paying for a staid pile of lackluster leafy greens. Still, I like strawberries. And I like avocado. And I like pecans. And this dressing sounded tasty. So I thought I’d give AllRecipes’ Strawberry and Avocado Salad a try.

Sounds neato, right? I thought so. However, there was one minor issue: namely, 609 calories and FIFTY-POINT-SEVEN grams of fat per serving. I realize numbers higher than eleven aren’t usually spelled out. I wanted some extra emphasis there.

Now, healthy oils are dandy, but to reiterate: FIFTY-POINT-SEVEN grams of fat? In a freakin’ salad? You gotta be kidding me. This wasn’t in the realm of possibility. In fact, I couldn’t even see the realm of possibility from where I read the recipe. That’s how far away it was.

But shucks, I still wanted the salad. Strawberries and avocado? C’mon. It’s like Christmas in summer. So, I made some changes. I dropped 75% of the pecans, 50% of the avocado, and added 50% more salad greens.

The result was three main course salads for … wait for it … 222 calories and FIFTEEN-POINT-THREE grams of fat. Those three dinky alterations meant 387 lost calories and THIRTY-FIVE-POINT-SEVEN lost grams of fat. And? If you don’t use all the dressing (we didn’t), the numbers drop even lower than that.

It still tasted great, to boot. No one flavor was overwhelming, we avoided mushiness, and divided among three plates, the sweetness was just right. The Husband-Elect and I ate it with a lovely bean concoction and a slice of last week’s Buttermilk-Vanilla Pound Cake. HEAVEN.

With that said, hope y’all have a lovely weekend. It’s been a wet June - great for food photos, bad for people. New Yorkers, stay dry!

P.S. Update on Monday’s post! We got our feet wet at the farmer’s market and hauled back some ground beef, fancy bacon, a loaf o’ whole wheat bread, and a dozen eggs. So far, the bread was quite tasty and the egg … well, it wasn’t just an egg. It was AN EGG. It asserted itself in my mouth, and I appreciate that. Next stop: Bacon City.

Strawberry and Avocado Salad
Makes 3 main dishes or 4 sides
Adapted from AllRecipes.

2 tablespoons white sugar
2 tablespoons olive oil
4 teaspoons honey
1 tablespoon cider vinegar
1 teaspoon lemon juice
3 cups torn salad greens (I used romaine. – Kris)
½ small avocado (about 2 ounces) - peeled, pitted and sliced into 1” pieces
10 strawberries, sliced
1/8 cup chopped pecans (or walnuts or almonds)

In a medium bowl, combine sugar, olive oil, honey, vinegar, and lemon juice. Whisk it all together and reserve 2 tablespoons dressing in a teacup. Add salad greens to bowl. Toss gently with dressing. Place avocado and strawberries on top of salad. Drizzle with the 2 tablespoons of dressing. Top with pecans. Serve.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
Three servings: 222 calories, 15.3 g fat, $1.02
Four servings: 167 calories, 11.5 g fat, $0.76

Calculations
2 tablespoons white sugar: 93 calories, 0 g fat, $0.04
2 tablespoons olive oil: 237 calories, 27 g fat, $0.24
4 teaspoons honey: 85 calories, 0 g fat, $0.13
1 tablespoon cider vinegar: 3 calories, 0 g fat, $0.02
1 teaspoon lemon juice: 2 calories, 0 g fat, $0.11
3 cups torn salad greens (romaine): 24 calories, 0.4 g fat, $0.45
½ avocado (about 2 ounces) - peeled, pitted, and sliced into 1-inch pieces: 91 calories, 8.3 g fat $0.75
10 strawberries, sliced: 38 calories, 0.4 g fat, $1.00
1/8 cup chopped pecans (or walnuts or almonds): 94 calories, 9.8 g fat, $0.31
TOTAL: 667 calories, 45.9 g fat, $3.05
PER SERVING (TOTAL/3): 222 calories, 15.3 g fat, $1.02
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 167 calories, 11.5 g fat, $0.76

Peas with Prosciutto and Mint: Uncomplicated, Unassailable

Sometimes, simple is best.

Short sentences. Black coffee. Blue jeans. T-shirts. Unadorned strawberries. Naps. Hand-written letters. Flip-flops. Daisies. Carole King. Garrison Keillor. Ina Garten. Baseball. Picnics. Peaches. Balloons. Fluffy pillows. Favorite blankets. Records. Sesame Street. Shel Silverstein. Charles M. Schulz. Walking. Grilling. Floating. Aspirin. Good socks. Good chairs. Good friends. Bowling. Regina Spektor. Crossword puzzles. Limericks. Haiku. Ogden Nash. Like Merchant Ships. The Wizard of Oz. Fishing. Planting. Climbing. Otis Redding. Wood floors. First-floor walkups. First apartments. Natural light. Beagles. Pizza. Beer. Cards. Owning one purse. Owning one pair of sunglasses. Owning three great bras. Fireworks. Sparklers. Cardboard Boxes. BUBBLE WRAP. Long drives. Uninterrupted countryside. Trees. Light breezes. Long days. Drawing. Finger painting. Ponytails. Olives. Swingsets. Slides. See-saws. Sand. Outdoor concerts. Motown. Ska. Rockabilly. Candles. Holding hands. Gardens. Thank you notes. Bananas. Wood frames. Radio.

Peas with Prosciutto and Mint from The Kitchn.

The better your ingredients, the better this dish will be. But I gotta say, I used frozen generic peas, mid-range prosciutto, and mint from my backyard, and it was really good nonetheless. The Husband-Elect and I ate it with an arugula salad and some grilled chicken, and basically, it was summer on a plate. It might even make you crave peas, which I’m pretty sure has never happened to any human.

So get out there and make some. Also, sweat some small stuff. It’s a good thing.

Peas with Prosciutto and Mint
Makes 4 side servings
Adapted from The Kitchn.

2 cups fresh or defrosted frozen shelled peas
1 tablespoons olive oil
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1/4 teaspoon coarse sea salt or kosher salt
6 mint leaves, sliced very thin (chiffonade)
1 ounce (about 2 thin slices) prosciutto, torn into bite-sized pieces

1) Fill a medium bowl with cold water and a few ice cubes.

2) Fill a medium pot with water and bring to a boil. Add salt. Add peas. Cook only a coupla seconds, until peas are defrosted/warmed. Drain. Pour peas in the ice bath so they stop cooking. Drain.

2) In a medium serving bowl (or you can wipe and re-use the ice bowl), add olive oil, pepper, and salt. Whisk it together. Add peas. Stir. Add mint. Stir. Add prosciutto. Gently stir. Serve.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
104 calories, 4.4 g fat, $0.39

Calculations
2 cups fresh or defrosted frozen shelled peas: 250 calories, 1 g fat, $0.72
1 tablespoons olive oil: 118 calories, 13.4 g fat, $0.12
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1/4 teaspoon coarse sea salt or kosher salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
6 mint leaves, sliced very thin (chiffonade): negligible calories and fat, FREE
1 ounce (about 2 thin slices) prosciutto: 50 calories, 3 g fat, $0.72
TOTAL: 418 calories, 17.4 g fat, $1.58
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 104 calories, 4.4 g fat, $0.39

Cantaloupe with Honey and Lime: a Holiday Bonus Recipe

Hey folks - just a quickie today, in honor of the holiday weekend. It’s a simple fruit dessert from Martha Stewart’s Everyday Food cookbook (one of mah favorites), guaranteed to make cantaloupe lovers melt and cantaloupe ambivalents (like me) reconsider. At 70 to 140 calories (depending on the serving size), you can’t beat the health aspect, either.

Happy day off!

Honey with Cantaloupe and Lime
Serves 4 to 8
From Everyday Food

1 cantaloupe, peeled and seeded (see here)
1/4 cup honey
1 lime

With a sharp pairing knife or awesome vegetable peeler, slice the cantaloupe into ribbons/as thin as you possibly can. The end results should be long, thin strips, kind of like carpaccio. Split the slices up among all the serving plates. Drizzle 1/2 to 1 tablespoon honey over each plate. Top with lime zest and lime juice. Stir if you like, but it's prettier left untouched. Serve a.s.a.p.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
Four servings: 139 calories, 0.4 g fat, $0.65
Eight servings: 69 calories, 0.2 g fat, $0.33

Calculations
1 cantaloupe, peeled and seeded: 277 calories, 1.6 g fat, $2.00
1/4 cup honey: 258 calories, 0 g fat, $0.35
1 lime: 20 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.25
TOTAL: 555 calories, 1.7 g fat, $2.60
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 139 calories, 0.4 g fat, $0.65
PER SERVING (TOTAL/8): 69 calories, 0.2 g fat, $0.33

I’m Just Here for the Hot Melon Salad

We begin today with a riddle. Or a joke. Or a question. I’m not really sure:

Q: What sounds like something you’d do on a 4th date, but is really a quite lovely combination of cantaloupe, honeydew, onion, feta, and pine nuts?

A: Alton Brown’s Hot Melon Salad.

Oh, yes. The name “Hot Melon Salad” may look like a chapter title in a Jackie Collins novel, but in reality, it’s a strange, delicious combination of fruit and cheese from one of my favorite cookbooks/kitchen manuals: I’m Just Here for the Food.

We talked about it a bit last week, but Alton’s James Beard Award-winning tome is definitely worth expanding on a bit more. As a cookbook, IJHftF is pretty good. There are 100 or so recipes, and of the ones I’ve made, none have bitten the big one. One – Scrambled Eggs – even changed the way eggs are cooked in our house (now in a metal bowl over a pot of simmering water). They’re heavenly, and a quantum leap over regular pan-heated eggs.

However, IJHftF isn’t meant to be just a recipe compilation. Instead, it’s a science textbook – a really cool science textbook that will make you feel like a huge nerd in the best possible way. With the help of Good Eats-style prose and mod graphics, Alton explains how water molecules work, the difference between convection and conduction, and of course, the intricacies of his beloved Maillard reaction. Best of all, it’s in a way I, who nearly failed high school physics, can understand. Seriously, you have to check it out.

Anyway, back to the Hot Melon Salad. (Hee.) This is in Alton’s … sauté chapter, I think … and after chopping, it comes together in about three minutes. You won’t find a faster side dish. (In fact, beware of cooking it for TOO long, or the melon itself will dissolve.)

Beyond that, it possesses a funky-yet-good flavor I’ve never quite experienced before, probably because I’m not in the habit of adding cheese to my hot melons. (“Adding cheese to my hot melons” - TELL ME THAT DOESN’T SOUND DIRTY, PEOPLE.) Tangy but sweet, with a soft consistency, I liked it, as did The Boyfriend. We’ll probably make it again when cantaloupe and honeydew are truly in season (and thus, much cheaper).

In conclusion: have a great weekend, check the book, and … hee … try some … *giggle* … Hot Melon Salad. It’ll whet your appetite, possibly in more ways than one. (HEEEE.)

Hot Melon Salad
Serves 4
From I’m Just Here for the Food by Alton Brown

1-1/2 tablespoon olive oil
1 medium red onion, sliced Lyonnaise-style (crescent moons)
2 cups diced assorted melon (cantaloupe, honeydew, etc.)
1 tablespoon basil, chiffonaded
Splash of red wine vinegar
Black pepper
1-1/2 ounces reduced fat crumbled feta
1 tablespoon toasted pine nuts

1) Heat a large skillet or wok over medium-high or high heat. Once it's hot, add oil. Quickly add onion. Cook 30 to 60 seconds, or until you can smell it. Add melon. Cook 2 minutes, or until it's starting to get a little soft. Add basil, vinegar, and pepper. Cook 30 to 60 seconds, stirring frequently. According to Alton, "If the melon is still too hard, cover and let steam briefly."

2) Kill heat and get pan off the burner. Quickly add cheese. Toss a little, but not so much that it's all melted. Serve with pine nuts on top.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
121 calories, 7.9 g fat, $1.00

Calculations
1-1/2 tablespoon olive oil: 179 calories, 20.2 g fat, $0.18
1 medium red onion: 46 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.35
2 cups diced assorted melon (cantaloupe, honeydew, etc.): 117 calories, 0.5 g fat, $1.32
1 tablespoon basil: 1 calorie, 0 g fat, $0.30
Splash of red wine vinegar: negligible calories and fat, $0.08
Black pepper: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1-1/2 ounces reduced fat crumbled feta: 88 calories, 5.6 g fat, $1.15
1 tablespoon toasted pine nuts: 53 calories, 5 g fat, $0.62
TOTAL: 484 calories, 31.4 g fat, $4.01
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 121 calories, 7.9 g fat, $1.00

Why Mango Lassis are the Best Ever, or, an Abundance of Mangoes

(You guys! My column today at Serious Eats is on Avocado Chicken Salad. No joke, it’s one of the best things I’ve made this year. Thanks to Mrs. Micah for the idea and The Boyfriend for slurping it up like a team of ravenous little leaguers.)

Last week, I came into possession of two large, ripe mangoes. And let me tell you, folks - there are few things in life greater than receiving mangoes for free. They include, but are not limited to:

• free backrubs
• free concert tickets
• freedom from oppression

Alas, as we were invaded by horrible, six-legged Woody Allen cartoons, it took me awhile to get to the beckoning fruit. Four days after their arrival, they weren’t quite mushy, but had most definitely surpassed the salsa stage. (Meaning the mangoes could be chopped up, but wouldn’t hold their shape very well.)

Here’s the rub: when you search online for mango recipes, 99.9 of the first 100 bazillion are for mango salsa. Once you scroll 14,000 pages past those, there’s a severed link for mango chutney. But never fret. Because if you persevere, you will find, at the very end of the internet, next to an 8-bit porno from 1982 and an ASCII drawing of Homer Simpson, a recipe for mango lassis.

Mango lassis, to put it simply, are THE BEST. An offshoot of the regular lassi (seen here), they’re shake-like and fruity and sweet and filling and positively wonderful. Plus, they have magical powers. Bad things don’t happen when mango lassis are around. To wit:

• If Joss Whedon knew about mango lassis, Buffy wouldn’t have become so weird in the last few seasons.
• If the Hells Angels knew about mango lassis, Altamont would never have happened.
• If Kim Jong-Il knew about mango lassis, North Korea would be a flourishing democratic republic/vacation spot, welcoming of all races and creeds, where nuclear warheads would be used as in-ground swimming pools instead of weapons of mass ouchification.

This mango lassi is a lighter version of the one from the lovely Elise at Simply Recipes. Though it uses milk, you could probably substitute cold water and/or crushed ice based on your preferences. Cardamom is optional, but couldn’t hurt.

In conclusion: mango lassi. Get one.

Mango Lassi
Serves 2
From Simply Recipes.

1 cup lowfat plain yogurt
1/2 cup 1% milk
1 cup chopped mango, peeled and stone removed (about 1 large)
4 teaspoons sugar, to taste
A dash of ground cardamom (optional)

1) Get out a blender. Add  yogurt, milk, mango, sugar, and cardamom. Blend for about 2 minutes, or until everything is smooth and relatively chunk-free. Distribute evenly among your glasses. Serve super-cold.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
190 calories, 2.8 g fat, $0.92

Calculations
1 cup lowfat plain yogurt: 154 calories, 3.9 g fat, $0.70
1/2 cup 1% milk: 53 calories, 1.2 g fat, $0.11
1 cup chopped mango, peeled and stone removed: 107 calories, 0.5 g fat, $0.99
4 teaspoons sugar, to taste: 65 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
TOTAL: 379 calories, 5.6 g fat, $1.83
PER SERVING (TOTAL/2): 190 calories, 2.8 g fat, $0.92

Veggie Might: Steamed Asparagus (Don’t Gild the Lily Shoots)

Penned by the effervescent Leigh, Veggie Might is a weekly Thursday column about the wide world of Vegetarianism.

Sometimes vegetables should just be left alone.

This past weekend, I spent three glorious days in the North Carolina sunshine with my best friend, A., and her husband and two-year-old. It was little C’s birthday, and I just couldn’t resist a circus-themed party.

Friday night before the big event, A. and I were fixing dinner: something light and fast before the hotdogs, cupcakes, and apple juice to come. A is the manager of the local farmer’s market in her area. One of the perks is first dibs on fresh produce while the farmers set up their stalls.

From her fridge, she pulled out a bundle of perfect, young asparagus stalks: the first of the season and the sweetest I’d ever tasted. We ate the thinnest stalks raw as we washed and snapped off the ends of the rest.

C toddled up and A. gave him a stalk. He took the asparagus and munched gleefully. I’ve never seen a kid eat vegetables like that. (I’ve also never typed the word “gleefully” before, but hey.)

“Sautee or steam?” A. asked.

“Steam,” I replied. It seemed like gilding the lily to put those perfect stems of green spring goodness in oil or butter. Turns out asparagus is a member of the lily family. Who knew? (Well, the people at that link and Mark Bittman.)

As you know, I’m a big fan of sautéing vegetables in garlic. How many recipes have I shared with that step? But even I know when to leave well enough alone.

A. seemed to know just how long to cook the asparagus, but I would have had to get help. I don’t trust myself for two reasons; I get impatient, and I get distracted.

I have no patience for standing over a pot of boiling water, even for a few minutes. After a minute has past, you can guarantee I will have wondered off like a two-year-old to see what else is going on, and then the veggies will have overcooked.

According to Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything Vegetarian, asparagus should be boiled in a skillet or steamed in a pan with just a bit of water at the bottom “just until the thick part of the stalk can be pierced with a knife.” Well, just how long is that? It depends on how much you’re cooking, of course. In our case, a bunch of about 20 stalks took 3 minutes to steam. A set a timer which let us wander guilt-free.

They were perfect: tender, slightly crunchy, vibrantly green. I know that, classically, asparagus is served with hollandaise or mayonnaise, but I’ve never understood why. Who thought to drench something so light and delicious with such heavy sauces?

We didn’t even think to salt our Carolina-grown spring bounty. If A. salted the water, I didn’t notice.

Our supper of fresh-from-the-farm veggies was one of the easiest and best meals I’ve eaten in a while. It reminded me that, sometimes, it’s best to let food be itself.

Steamed Asparagus
Serves 3 – 4

20 asparagus stalks
1/2 cup of water

1) Wash asparagus and break off woody ends.

2) Put water in sauce pan. Put asparagus in steamer basket or bamboo steamer and place over sauce pan. (You can also use the Mark Bittman methods above.)

3) Bring water to boil.

4) Steam for approximately 3 minutes or until thick ends of stalks are tender.

5) Dress as desired or eat plain. Plain is good. Really good.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price* per Serving
Four servings: 15 calories, .1g fat, $.37
Three servings: 20 calories, .13g fat, $.50

Calculations
Asparagus: 60 calories, .4g fat, $1.50
TOTAL: 60 calories, .4g fat, $1.50
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 15 calories, .1g fat, $.37
PER SERVING (TOTAL/3): 20 calories, .13g fat, $.50

*Price is from my local market.

Scrumptious Scramble: Weekend, Ho!

(Hey folks – today at Serious Eats, my column’s on Chicken Paprikash from Cooking Light. S’good stuff and a solid weekday dinner. Witness, if you get the chance.)

In our house (okay, apartment), weekend mornings are sacred. Since our roommates are usually out, they’re the few times The Boyfriend and I can sit uninterrupted (except for the $%&^# dog) and talk about whatever for an hour. The conversation can and does extend to politics, food, our parents, imaginary vacation plans, or whatever. Saturday, we talked about Dungeons & Dragons and farting. Yesterday, it was string theory and whether or not the universe actually has an edge.

Since the time is so valuable, we usually prep a big spread to go along with it – pancakes, bacon, eggs, fruit, really good coffee from here – the works. It’s cheaper and more personal than going out to brunch, and you don’t run into nearly as many hipsters. (P.S. If you live in Brooklyn, but aren’t from here, and don’t think you’re a hipster … you’re definitely a hipster. Nice face, hipster.)

We tend to fall back on omelets, French toast, and whatever else doesn’t need milk (because I forgot it again), but lately, I’ve been attempting to change things up a bit. Potato and Chorizo Frittata is a recent example, as is Sweet Crespelles. This weekend, it was Ellie Krieger’s Scrumptious Scramble, the idea of which I bogarted from Serious Eats.

I like Ellie muchly, because A) her food philosophy closely mirrors my own, and B) I covet her sweater collection. She’s all about real food in moderate doses. I’ve never seen her resort to diet products, and she speaks like a normal human being instead of a McKenzie brother filled with helium.

Oh, and her food’s good, too. This particular scrambled egg dish is amped up with tomato, red onion, and dill. Seriously, dill. The stuff you use to make pickles. As it turns out, dill is delicious with eggs, too, and it’s an unexpected respite from regular ol’ breakfast flavors.

So, next time you have a weekend morning, try this dish. It’s perfect for when you just want to sit and talk about the canon or Cormac McCarthy and/or whether flowers have butts.

Scrumptious Scramble
Serves 4
Adapted from Ellie Krieger

1 teaspoon olive oil
1/2 cup diced red onion
1 medium ripe tomato, cored, seeded, and diced (about 1 cup)
3 large eggs
5 large egg whites
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh dill
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

1) Heat olive oi over medium heat in a medium pan, preferably nonstick. Add onion. Cook about 2 minutes, stirring maybe twice. Add tomato. Cook 1 minute. Remove mixture to a nearby bowl. Turn heat down to medium-low.

2) Combine eggs and egg whites in a medium bowl. Whisk together.

3) Pour eggs into pan. Scramble a few minutes, until eggs are just about done. Drain collected water from tomato bowl. Pour tomatoes and onions into pan. Stir gently to combine. Add dill. Salt and pepper to taste. Stir once or twice. Serve. 

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
101 calories, 4.8 g fat, $0.73

Calculations
1 teaspoon olive oil: 39 calories, 4.5 g fat, $0.11
1/2 cup diced red onion: 34 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.28
1 medium ripe tomato, cored, seeded, and diced (about 1 cup): 22 calories, 0.2 g fat, $0.75
3 large eggs: 221 calories, 13.9 g fat, $0.55
5 large egg whites: 86 calories, 0.3 g fat, $0.91
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh dill: negligible calories and fat, $0.30
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
TOTAL: 402 calories, 19 g fat, $2.92
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 101 calories, 4.8 g fat, $0.73

Grasslands Herb Salsa: Sweet Mongolia

In the past 20 months, we’ve featured recipes from India, Israel, Italy, and … well, many other countries beginning with the letter “I.” But it’s pretty rare we get to highlight food from outer Mongolia. Or rather: from a town located between Mongolia and Siberia called Manzhouli. (Thanks, Serious Eats!)

In olden days, we used “outer Mongolia” as a synonym for “very far away.” (Also see: Guam, Mars, East Bumble****.) Up until several hours ago, the only things I knew about the place is that it borders China, and my friend J was considering working on a Habitat for Humanity project there. (Which I’m fairly sure solicited a shocked “MONGOLIA?” from each and every person she told.)

But now, I’m a virtual expert. (Meaning: I looked at Wikipedia, which is a virtual reference guide in the computer sense.) For instance, did you know Mongolia has a Pegasus on its coat of arms? Or that it’s a parliamentary republic? Or that its national anthem is titled "Монгол улсын төрийн дуулал"? (Literally: “Welcome to Mongolia. Instead of Mints, You Will Find Mutton Jerky Under Your Hotel Pillow.”) Well, now you do.

Apparently, beyond noodles and awesome barbecue (which may or may not be an actual regional invention), Mongolians are also fond of roasted meats – especially goats and sheep. Turns out, they need the animal fat to survive the winters, which, being a total cold weather wussy, would cause me to perish in under 20 seconds.

This recipe, Grasslands Herb Salsa, is a topping for those roasted meats. It’s from a gorgeous cookbook called Beyond the Great Wall: Recipes and Travels in the Other China, which was nominated for a James Beard Award earlier this week.

Essentially, it's a simple cilantro-based salsa that’s entirely unimpressive on its own, but morphs into something highly delicious when applied to pan-cooked chicken breast. In fact, The Boyfriend and I have eaten chicken two of the last four nights, just for an excuse to use the salsa. There are about two tablespoons left, so he should expect chicken on Saturday night, too. Poor guy.

Should you decide to make it yourself … actually, there’s not much to know. It’s only 12 calories a serving, and it’s simple enough that a kindergartener could make it. Granted, it would have to be a kindergartener who’s accustomed to food processing, but you get the picture.

Anyway, happy weekend, sweet readers. Hope your days off are as cool as Mongolia. Cooler, even.

Grasslands Herb Salsa
Makes about 3/4 cup, or enough for six chicken filets
Adapted from Beyond the Great Wall: Recipes and Travels in the Other China

2 cups packed cilantro (a.k.a. coriander) leaves and stems
1/2 cup coarsely chopped scallions (white and tender green parts)
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste

1) In a food processor, puree herbs and scallions until they're a "coarse paste." Add vinegar and salt. Pulse. Salt and pepper to taste. (I needed a little more salt.)

2) Pour into a small bowl. Allow guests/family to spoon their own salsa on to their meat.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.37

Calculations
2 cups packed cilantro (leaves and stems): 7 calories, 0.2 g fat, $1.50
1/2 cup coarsely chopped scallions (white and tender green parts): 16 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.22
2 tablespoons rice vinegar: 50 calories, 0 g fat, $0.48
1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
TOTAL: 73 calories, 0.3 g fat, $2.21
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): 12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.37

Sweet Crespelles and a Stream of Consciousness

Saturday morning. Warmer than yesterday. Boyfriend’s in Queens shooting a sketch. Roommates at brunch. Roommates’ dog … also at brunch? House to myself. Sweet. Turn 101.9 up loud. Wear eyeglasses instead of contacts. Forgo makeup (for now). Contemplate pantslessness. Decide on pants, should roommates come home early.

Make coffee. Ponder breakfast. No cereal. Out of syrup. Need a break from omelets. Have about 2 cups of flour left in the pantry. What to do … what to do …

Ahhhhhh. Crespelles. Italian crepes. Found recipe on Serious Eats earlier in the week. Came from Gina DePalma, the pastry chef at Babbo. That means it’s gotta be good, right? 14,000 versions of dish on the post. Will use the club soda/vanilla extract
combination. Good times.

Combine ingredients. Heat pan. Pour batter in. Wow, I’m terrible at this swirling thing. (Example at right). Need to thin batter with a little club soda and try again. Okay, that’s better. Make second crespelle. And third. And fourth. And … etcetera, etcetera, all the way up to nine. Supposed to make 11 to 13, but chalk it up to being a first-timer.

Okay, now what? What do I fill these things with? Fruit, probably. Maybe strawberry topping? Or blueberry? Or … BANANA. That’s it. And easy. Drop tablespoon of butter in a pan. Melt tablespoon of brown sugar in it. Add one chopped banana. Saute 2 minutes. Add dash of cinnamon, splash of rum. We’re good to go.

Sit down. Pour coffee. Pick up O Magazine (because I’m 50). Read Michelle Obama interview in entirety. Fall in love with her a little more. Eat crespelle. Tastes not unlike super-subtle fortune cookies filled with bananas. I can get with this. Delicious.

Store remaining crespelle in plastic bag between sheets of parchment paper. Will probably stay for a day or two. Briefly wonder where dog is. Forget and enjoy several successive minutes of silence/non-barking.

Get started on post. Do calculations. 84 calories, 3.4 grams of fat per crespelle. Nice. And … what’s this? SEVEN CENTS PER SERVING? Sweet. Will make this again.

Finish post. Listen to Beyonce’s “Halo.” Make decision that I prefer her lower register. Remember crespelle fondly. Fart.

Basic Sweet Crespelle
Makes about 11 crespelles
Adapted from Gina DePalma's recipe on Serious Eats.

1/2 cup 2% milk
1/2 cup club soda
1 large egg
2 1/2 tablespoons butter, melted
2 tablespoons sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour

1) Get out a blender. Add everything but the flour. Blend briefly to mix the ingredients. Add flour. Blend again, until batter is smooth and lumpless. Scrape the sides if necessary. Set aside, and scoop out any lumps that rise to the surface.

2) Grease a medium pan. Preheat over medium-high. Once it's pretty hot, add just enough batter to cover the pan's bottom, and swirl it around. (If it's too thick, add a little OJ.) Cook a few minutes, until edges are set and start to lightly brown. Using a spatula, carefully flip the crespella. Cook only 30 more seconds, until it's totally cooked. Do the same with the rest of the batter. (You will get better at it as you go along; it's okay to dump the mistakes.)

3) Stack finished crespelle between sheets of parchment paper, "keeping them warm in a low oven."  Serve with fruit and powdered sugar.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
86 calories, 3.4 g fat, $0.07

Calculations
1/2 cup 2% milk: 61 calories, 2.5 g fat, $0.13
1/2 cup club soda: negligible calories and fat, $0.09
1 large egg: 74 calories, 5 g fat, $0.13
2 1/2 tablespoons butter: 255 calories, 28.8 g fat, $0.15
2 tablespoons sugar: 93 calories, 0 g fat, $0.04
1/4 teaspoon salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1 teaspoons vanilla extract: 12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.12
1 cup all-purpose flour: 455 calories, 1.3 g fat, $0.10
TOTAL: 950 calories, 37.6 g fat, $0.77
PER SERVING (TOTAL/11): 86 calories, 3.4 g fat, $0.07

Veggie Might: Kismet Salad (Grapefruit and Avocado Salad)

Written by the fabulous Leigh, Veggie Might is a regular Thursday feature about all things Vegetarian.

Tuesday is my favorite day of the week. It’s an ordinary day, when nothing special happens, but it’s bursting with the potential to be extraordinary. And something amazing happened Tuesday night.

I was so tired when I got home from work. I only wanted to fall down on my bed with my cute monkey dog and go to sleep. But I was also hungry and there was “nothing” in the fridge. I flopped on the couch and picked up the new New York Magazine from the coffee table.

After I cried for the hundredth time about the Greatest American Hero, Sully, and his pilot/hero cohort, I turned the page, and there, under a stunning photo of a juicy, pink grapefruit, was the perfect recipe. It was exactly the kind of thing I’ve been craving; and I had all the ingredients in my kitchen.

I. Kid. You. Not. Who looks in a magazine and goes, oh that looks good. I’ll make that right now? No one! Except maybe Martha Stewart after looking at her own magazine.

But this time it happened to me. Angels and editors sent me Amanda Cohen’s Grapefruit Salad on a regular ol’ ho-hum Tuesday. It was kismet (or Brigadoon). It was Tuesday. My energy was restored.

Giving the recipe another quick scan, I decided it was a tad fussier than necessary for my taste or time constraint. It calls for the grapefruit to be candied and served as lollipops, a treatment that had me scratching my head.

Grapefruit, especially when in season (like right now!), is perfect. Why go dipping it in sugar? In the article, Ms. Cohen, controversial owner-chef of the new East Village vegetarian joint Dirt Candy quips, “Who doesn’t like candy in a salad?”

Well, me for one. I decided to leave the grapefruit sections au natural. She also tops the salad with “grilled cheese croutons,” which sound amazing, but, like the grapefruit lollies, a bit like gilding the lily.

I made two other substitutions. Instead of salad greens, I went with spinach because, well, that’s what I had. Verdict: spinach works great. Delicious. No complaints. Go vitamins A & K!

When I got to the dressing, I was out of shallots so I subbed minced leek and a pinch of garlic. Magnifique! Seriously. That dressing is outstanding. The recipe makes a cup, and you will be so glad to have mucho leftover.

Okay, this is starting to sound a bit less like kismet than creating my own reality, but I’m okay with that; this is the best Dame Judy Dench salad I’ve ever put in my mouth that doesn’t have blue cheese and pecans on it. Helen Mirren, if I voted today, it just might win over blue cheese and pecans.

All this effusion and I haven’t even mentioned how it all combines with the toasted almonds and avocado. Well, great Maggie Smith in the morning, it does so beautifully. The tangy grapefruit plays off the mild avocado, and the crunchy almonds give it a snap.

This healthy, joyful winter salad is as light and fragrant as spring and perfect for a Tuesday.

Grapefruit and Avocado Kismet Salad
Inspired by Amanda Cohen’s Grapefruit Salad
Serves 4


Salad
2/3 large grapefruit (about 8 sections)
1/2 avocado, cubed
3 tbsp sliced almonds
4 cups fresh spinach
4 tsp dressing (see below)

Dressing
3/4 cup olive oil
1/4 cup grapefruit juice (about 3-4 sections)
2 tbsp lemon juice (about 1/2 lemon)
2 tbsp grapefruit zest
1 tbsp minced leek
1/2 clove minced garlic
1 tsp ground mustard
2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp fresh pepper

1) Preheat the oven to 350°.

2) Peel grapefruit and set aside rind. Remove pith and membrane from 8 sections. If you know how to supreme citrus, go for it. I just do it by hand. Place the good stuff in a small bowl and set in the fridge to chill.

3) Juice the remaining 3-4 segments and strain 1/4 c. grapefruit juice into your blender or food processor.

4) Add lemon juice, minced leek, garlic, and spices to blender.

5) Grab that grapefruit rind you set aside. Zest the grapefruit rind using the fine side of your box grater (or whatever zest tool you have). Add to blender.

Real quick...
6) Place sliced almonds on baking sheet and toast for five minutes.

While the almonds are toasting...
7) Give the juices and spices a couple of zaps in the blender. Then slowly drizzle in oil and blend until it emulsifies.

8) Remove almonds from the oven and allow to cool.

9) Wash and chop or tear spinach as desired. I chop mine in a wide chiffonade.

10) Peel and chop avocado.

To assemble salad
11) Toss spinach with 4 tsp of dressing. (The dressing really goes a long way.) Add avocadoes and grapefruit. Give it another toss. Sprinkle with sliced almonds when you’re ready to serve. Eat, ooh, and aah.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price per Serving
128 calories, 9.2g fat, $.89

Calculations
1 large grapefruit: 97 calories, 0g fat, $.93
1/2 avocado: 161 calories, 15g fat, $.99
3 tbsp sliced almonds: 100.8 calories, 8.4g fat, $.49
4 cups fresh spinach: 28 calories, 0g fat, $.99
4 tsp dressing: 125 calories, 13.5g fat, $.16
Totals: 511.8 calories, 36.9g fat, $3.56
Per Serving: 128 calories, 9.2g fat, $.89

Egg McMuffins for Homeskillets

Like 10% of all Americans, I used to work at McDonalds. Like 33% of all McDonalds workers, it was the morning shift.

Everyday in the summer of 1997, I hauled my cookies in at 5am to start the percolator, fire up the grill, and lug 50 pounds of Happy Meal toys out of the sub-basement. My early morning co-workers were a sweet 72-year-old, a slightly retarded janitor, and a middle-aged woman that had no business dealing with the public. On good days, I got to take orders from the drive-through, and didn’t have to face anyone for a few hours. On bad days, entire buses of senior citizens would argue with me over the price of a 60-cent cup of coffee.

During that time, I learned the menu backwards and forwards, including basic nutritional information for most of the meals. While the Deluxe breakfast would melt your aorta, I was always pleasantly surprised at the Egg McMuffin. An egg, a muffin, a slice of Canadian bacon, and a dollop of cheese would come in around 300 calories, which still stands as one of the leanest fast food breakfasts around. Plus, they were (and are) delicious. I know. I ate one every morning for three months.

After last week’s Strata, I had a bunch of leftover Canadian bacon, and decided to give homemade Egg McMuffins a shot. Happily, it wasn’t rocket science, and ten minutes of cooking time scored me two eminently edible imitations of the real thing. Even better, no one yelled at me afterward.

So! For your McMuffining pleasure, here are step-by-step instructions for homemade Mickey D’s. Of course, there are a few things to know first:

1) If you don’t have an egg ring handy (and who does?), try a THOROUGHLY WASHED tuna can with the lids pried off. (NOTE: Don’t use a Bumblebee can. The bottom lid sticks outward, making it nearly impossible to remove. See the pics below? It took ten minutes of straight-up wrestling to create that hole. In the end, it was big enough to pour the egg through, but I almost lost a thumb in the process.)

2) For a more McDonalds-like experience, go with American Cheese. Then, have a 62-year-old retiree berate you because his coffee was too hot.

3) The muffins aren’t browned in a toaster for two reasons: A) they’re harder to hold, and B) I like ‘em better this way.

4) At $0.93 a serving, these should be cheaper than your local Mickey D’s. If not, look at it this way: you don’t have to deal with the tall girl behind the counter. You know – the one with the 1000-yard stare, whose only thought is, “Man, I can’t wait to get back to school. This nametag is making my boobs itch.”

Happy cooking!

Egg McMuffins
Makes 2 McMuffins

Cooking spray
2 English muffins, split in half
2 slices Canadian bacon
2 large eggs
1 ounce reduced-fat sharp cheddar cheese, grated (I prefer Cracker Barrel)
Salt and pepper to taste

1) Coat a medium non-stick pan with cooking spray and heat on medium-high. Once pan is warm, place English muffins facedown on pan. Squish lightly with a spatula, so they get evenly browned.

2) While muffins are toasting, break one egg into a cup. Break its yolk with a fork, but DON’T beat the egg.

3) When muffins have been lightly toasted (about 3 minutes), place them on a plate and IMMEDIATELY sprinkle grated cheese on one side. This will get the melting process started.

4) Re-coat the pan with cooking spray. (Note: if you have a gas oven, do this away from the stovetop to avoid a fire.) Place the Canadian bacon in the pan. Place an egg ring OR thoroughly washed tuna can (with both lids removed) on the pan. Pour the egg into the ring. If some should leak out the bottom, no worries. You can flip it later.

5) After 2 or 3 minutes, the egg should be pretty set, so cut it out of the ring and flip it over. Then, add egg #2 to the ring. Flip the bacon while you're at it, too.

6) After another minute or so, egg #1 should be finished. Place it on top of one of the cheese-covered muffin halves, and add salt and pepper to taste. Then, add a slice of Canadian bacon and top with the other muffin half. Press down lightly with a spatula so the egg will finish melting the cheese.

7) Repeat steps 5 and 6 with the remaining ingredients.

8) Take a blog picture in front of a sufficient light source.

9) Serve and eat with glee.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
283 calories, 12.4 g fat, $0.93

Calculations
Cooking spray: 0 calories, 0 g fat, $0.04
2 English muffins, split in half: 240 calories, 2 g fat, $0.38
2 slices Canadian bacon: 89 calories, 4 g fat, $0.79
2 large eggs: 147 calories, 9.9 g fat, $0.38
1 ounce reduced-fat sharp cheddar cheese, grated: 90 calories, 9 g fat, $0.25
Salt and pepper to taste: 0 calories, 0 g fat, $0.02
TOTAL: 566 calories, 24.9 g fat, $1.86
PER SERVING (TOTAL/2): 283 calories, 12.4 g fat, $0.93

Autumn Apple Salad, My Middle Eastern Grocer, and Me

Beyond decent coffee and lots of easily obtainable heroin, the nicest things about my area of Brooklyn are the Middle Eastern grocery stores around the corner. There’s a small row of them, two of which have bulk grains, nuts, and dried fruits stretching from here to eternity. Their foods are about a billion times cheaper than my supermarket, and one of the places is even pretty clean, which is an unexpected bonus.

I bring this up is because this past weekend, I found the brain-meltingly tasty Autumn Apple Salad II on AllRecipes. It’s a simple, easy-to-make, totally delicious Waldorf-esque concoction flavored by yogurt, tart apples, toasted almonds, cranberries, and cherries instead of heavy cream and/or mayonnaise (my most hated food-like item). And since most of that stuff costs a bundle around here, the whole scrumptious shebang would have gone unmade had it not been for my aforementioned Middle Eastern grocer.

(And that, my friends, would have been tragedy. Because this salad, if I haven’t mentioned, is good.)

I popped in on Saturday, and among the trays of baklava and tins of Turkish Delight were jars and jars of every wrinkled delicacy in existence: figs, raisins, pineapples, ginger, prunes, apricots, and of course, cranberries and cherries. The almonds were located just a few urns down, hidden in a menagerie of pistachios, walnuts, pecans, and every other nut you could imagine. I could have stayed for hours, just browsing (and occasionally picking), but instead, paid my $1.77 and left.

Fortunately, within ten minutes of arriving home, I had Autumn Apple Salad II to comfort me. (Not to belabor the point, but: good.) The Boyfriend loved it, too, and I’ll be making it muchly next Fall, when Granny Smiths are actually in season.

Anyway, enjoy. And get grocer-in’.

Autumn Apple Salad
Makes about 4.5 cups of salad, or 6 servings of ¾ cups each
Adapted from All Recipes.

4 tart green apples
1/4 cup toasted blanched slivered almonds
1/4 cup dried cranberries
1/4 cup chopped dried cherries
1 (8 ounce) container light vanilla yogurt

1) In a medium bowl, combine all ingredients. Stir until thoroughly mixed and apples are coated.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
150 calories, 3.3 g fat, 4.5 g fiber, $0.89

Calculations
4 tart green apples: 320 calories, 0 g fat, 20 g fiber, $2.97
1/4 cup blanched slivered almonds: 167 calories, 15.9 g fat, 3.3 g fiber, $0.73
1/4 cup dried cranberries: 103 calories, 0.4 g fat, 2.2 g fiber, $0.48
1/4 cup chopped dried cherries: 100 calories, 1 g fat, 2 g fiber, $0.56
1 (8 ounce) container vanilla yogurt: 210 calories, 2.5 g fat, 0 g fiber, $0.57
TOTAL: 900 calories, 19.8 g fat, 27.2 g fiber, $5.31
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): 150 calories, 3.3 g fat, 4.5 g fiber, $0.89

North African-Style Chickpea Salad and Lessons From 2008

Boy, 2008 was weird, wasn’t it? I can’t remember a year that’s been more at odds with itself. But there were lessons (note: I almost typed “lesions”) to be learned. Like:

1) When playing Hide and Seek with a three-year-old, it’s perfectly acceptable to hide by standing directly in front of the child. He’ll get a kick out of it, and you won’t risk not being found.

2) Unemployment is fun and educational! For one thing, you discover that your city block is 12,000 times more terrifying during the day, when the junkies roam freely and yell at stoplights. For another thing … actually, that’s it.

3) “When are you guys getting married?” is the most headache-inducing question on Earth, right after “So, how do you want that spike extracted from your face?”

4) Do not go to the bathroom in Jaipur’s Amber Fort. I’m pretty sure it’s a real-life Hellmouth. Otherwise, India is pretty awesome.

5) When your landlord says, “We’ll have it done tomorrow,” what he actually means is, “Who are you, why are you in my office, and where are my bagels?”

6) My job is pretty neat when we’re not arguing with management over whether or not we’ll be receiving health benefits next year. Also: new coffee machine!

7) Being a Mets fan may be hard, but it’s not nearly as difficult as being a Chicago Cubs or Detroit Lions fan. We may have blown the last two seasons ON THE FINAL DAY, but least we have Johan Santana and decent pizza. Also: *cry*

8) I don’t need to ever watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, because the commercials are enough to make me openly weep.

9) Worth the time: Slumdog Millionaire, The Wrestler, Role Models, Wall-E, the Sandwich Day episode of 30 Rock, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler in general, sincerity = the new irony, Postcards From Yo Momma, watching old Heart videos on YouTube, Deb’s chocolate chip cookies, Drunk History, Literal A-Ha, KEXP.org, Flight of the Conchords, community organizers.

10) Not worth the time: pinkeye, another story about Sarah Palin’s wardrobe.

11) Bizarre food combinations occasionally work out: strawberries and balsamic vinegar, black beans and brownie mix, nectarines and blue cheese, cranberries and mint, and chickpeas and raisins. Which, coincidentally, brings us to today’s recipe, North African Style Chickpea Salad, from my new favorite culinary tome, Cook’s Illustrated Best Light Recipe book (also highlighted in today’s Serious Eats column about Barley Risotto).

Boasting six grams of fiber per serving and a 15-minute prep time, this neat little side dish is a grand ol’ accompaniment to … well, almost anything. I had some for lunch today alongside pineapple and The Boyfriend’s mom’s Honey Oatmeal Raisin Cookies, and it was like riding a unicorn in Valhalla. (Translation: very good.) The mint and raisin go together surprisingly well, and provide a nice counterpart to the savory chickpeas. Who knew?

Oh, one note: the nutrition information provided by Cook’s Illustrated, but the price calculations are my own. Enjoy!

North African-Style Chickpea Salad
Serves 6
Adapted from Cook’s Illustrated Best Light Recipe.

2 (15.5 ounce) cans chickpeas, drained and rinsed
1 carrot, peeled and grated
½ cup raisins
2 Tablespoons fresh mint leaves
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
1-1/2 tablespoons juice from 1 lemon
1 small garlic clove, minced or pressed (about ½ teaspoon)
½ teaspoon ground cumin
½ teaspoon paprika
salt and ground black pepper

1) In a large mixing or serving bowl, combine chickpeas, grated carrots, raisins and mint. Stir. 

2) In a separate small bowl, combine oil, lemon juice, garlic, cumin, and paprika. Whisk it together, like you would a dressing. Pour over chickpea mixture and stir thoroughly to combine. Salt and pepper to taste. Serve at room temperature or a little chilled. Great for picnics.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
200 calories, 7 g fat, $0.63

Calculations
2 (15.5 ounce) cans chickpeas, drained and rinsed: $1.32
1 carrot, peeled and drained: $0.10
½ cup raisins: $0.35
2 Tablespoons fresh mint leaves: $1.50
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil: $0.23
1-1/2 tablespoons juice from 1 lemon: $.20
1 small garlic clove, minced or pressed (about ½ teaspoon): $0.03
½ teaspoon ground cumin: $0.01
½ teaspoon paprika: $0.02
salt and ground black pepper: $0.02
TOTAL: $3.78
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): $0.63

Shaksouka? I Barely Even Know Ya! (Sorry.)

It’s snowing like mad outside, the office is unusually quiet, and A Charlie Brown Christmas is playing quietly on my cubicle computer. In a way, this is the holidays in all Big Apple workplaces: peacefully festive, with a tinge of melancholy. Or, maybe everyone’s just hung over from last night’s Christmas party. Take your pick.

Like every other place in America, it’s been slightly-to-mostly insane over here lately, what with card sending, gift shopping, tinsel hanging, funeral attending, and getting papers/projects/life in order for the ever-approaching New Year. There haven’t been many hours left for cooking, either, save for today’s dish, Shaksouka, and a botched attempt at quesadillas on Wednesday night. (On a related note: what kind of adult messes up a quesadilla? First graders are taught to make them before they’re taught to add.)

Anyway, about the Shaksouka: it’s an Israeli dish that’s tasty, incredibly inexpensive, relatively healthy, and (for all you secret six-year-olds out there) really, really fun to eat. Essentially eggs poached in a subtly spicy tomato sauce, the idea is to spoon a helping into a bowl, and then sop it up with a big hunk of thick, crusty bread. And if you can keep the sauce off your pants … bonus.

I made two alterations to the original Serious Eats recipe, which called for fresh oregano (I used 3/4 teaspoon of the dried stuff), and a 28-oz. can of crushed tomatoes (I pulsed a can of whole tomatoes five times in mah food processor for a fresher taste). Both changes worked beautifully, and The Boyfriend and I even have a cup of leftover tomato sauce for future pasta dishes. (Note to leftovers fiends: the eggs themselves probably won't keep very well, so I'd eat them a.s.a.p.)

Oh, and last thing – I didn’t have to go shopping for any of the ingredients in this dish. They were all already in the pantry, which is the culinary equivalent of discovering a forgotten $20 bill in your pants pocket. Pretty sweet, if you ask me.

P.S. Calculations are for four servings, though the picture only depicts two portions.

Shaksouka (or Shakshouka) (or Eggs Poached in Tomato Sauce)
Serves 2 to 4
Adapted from Serious Eats.

1 tablespoon olive oil
1 small onion, diced small
3 cloves garlic, roughly chopped
1 (28-ounce) can crushed tomatoes or 1 (28-ounce) can whole peeled tomatoes pulsed a few times
2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground coriander
1/2 teaspoon paprika
3/4 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 cup water
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 - 8 eggs

1) In a large skillet or saute pan, heat oil over medium heat. Add onions and garlic. Cook 5 minutes, until onions are kind of soft, stirring occasionally. Add tomatoes, cumin, coriander, paprika, oregano and water. Stir. Salt and pepper to taste. Jack heat up to high. When sauce comes to a boil, drop heat back to medium-low, cover, and cook 25 minutes, stirring occasionally.

2) Carefully crack eggs into sauce so they're evenly spaced. Re-cover skillet. Cook 5 minutes until eggs are just the way you like 'em. DO NOT STIR.

3) Carefully scoop eggs and a bunch of sauce into bowls. Serve with bread for some good times.

Note from Tara the original Serious Eats author: "Alternatively, if you are preparing up to 8 eggs and your pan isn’t wide enough to accommodate all of the eggs at once, poach them separately in water and add them to the sauce to serve."

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
252 calories, 13.9 g fat, $1.04

Calculations
1 tablespoon olive oil: 119 calories, 13.5 g fat, $0.12
1 small onion: 29 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.16
3 cloves garlic: 13 calories, 0 g fat, $0.12
1 (28-ounce) can chunky crushed tomatoes (or “chef’s cut”): 254 calories, 2.2 g fat, $2.00
2 teaspoons ground cumin: negligible calories and fat, $0.03
1 teaspoon ground coriander: negligible calories and fat, $0.13
1/2 teaspoon paprika: 3 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.02
3/4 teaspoon oregano: 2 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
1/2 cup water: negligible calories and fat, FREE
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
8 eggs: 588 calories, 39.8 g fat, $1.53
TOTAL: 1008 calories, 55.7 g fat, $4.16
PER SERVING: 252 calories, 13.9 g fat, $1.04

K.I.S.S.: Light Garlic Bread

Don’t you love when a recipe is simple enough for a first grader, takes ten seconds to make, and still comes out like you’d been consulting with a cadre of Iron Chefs for 12 years? I do. It's kind of my reason for existence, besides The Office, schlocky horror novels, and clever Evite responses.

The Ridiculously Good Yet Stupefyingly Uncomplicated thing's occured a few times over the course of the blog. First there was Nigella Lawson’s Easy Pea Soup, which made me crave peas for the first time in over three decades of life. Then, there were the lassis, which I prefer to any milkshake in existence (even McDonald’s Egg Nog variety, which is the pinnacle of fast food cuisine). Finally, there was Polenta Pudding with Blueberry Topping, which was so embarrassingly facile, I almost didn’t post it.

Now, it’s Eating Well’s Light Garlic Bread. Essentially, you boil four garlic cloves, mash them in a paste with a little salt and olive oil, spread it on some bread, and bake for five minutes. The results are … well, not astounding (I like to save that word for miracles and mid-air rescues), but really, really dang good. The bread is moist where it should be, crisp where it’s not moist, and crazy-garlicky without being overwhelming. And honestly, there’s something eminently satisfying about pulverizing things with a fork. Like, “You’re no match for ME, garlic! Now, off to save some kittens from a tree! (*flies away*)”

The kicker? It costs $0.80 to make, total. I don’t know why anyone would buy frozen garlic bread in the first place, but I’m pretty sure that’s a 300% savings. It makes it all the more satisfying.

So, I encourage you to embark on this mission. But if you do, a few notes:

1) Eating Well provided the nutrition data, so only the price is calculated here.

2) If you’re using a loaf of Italian bread, go with a third of it instead of half. They tend to be much larger than baguettes.

3) Seriously, a monkey could make this. You barely need thumbs.

Happy eating, folks.

Light Garlic Bread
Serves 4
Adapted from EatingWell.com

4 large cloves garlic, peeled
1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 baguette or 1/3rd loaf Italian bread, cut in half lengthwise

1) Preheat oven to 450°F.

2) In very small pot or saucepan, combine garlic and juuuust enough cold water to cover it. Turn heat to low. Once water starts simmering, cook for about 3 minutes. Kill the water and drain the pot. making sure to keep the garlic.

3) In a small bowl, combine garlic, oil, and salt. Mash 'em into a paste using a fork or spoon. (This might take a few minutes.) Spread the paste on the bread, as you would butter.

4) Bake 5 minutes. Serve.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
113 calories, 2 g fat, $0.20

Calculations
4 large cloves garlic: $0.16
1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil: $0.04
1/4 teaspoon salt: $0.01
1/2 baguette or 1/3rd loaf Italian bread, cut in half lengthwise: $0.60
TOTAL: $0.81
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): $0.20

Light Buttermilk Pancakes: The CHG Endgame

That’s it, folks. It's over. We found it. We’ve discovered the cheapest, leanest, most easily-prepared meal in the history of this blog – even moreso than Popovers, Light Banana Bread, and Leigh’s Chai Masala from yesterday. Seriously. It’s official. We can pack it in.

Oh, but I jest. We’re not really leaving (because I’d have no excuse to post random George Clooney pictures anymore), but I’m not sure where to go after Cooking Light’s Buttermilk Pancakes. In order, they are:

• the fluffiest pancakes I’ve ever had. If society allowed, I would make a mattress out of them, and munch quietly on layer after delicious layer while The Boyfriend slept.
• at 10 cents per pancake, I believe the cheapest food on CHG to date.
• simple enough for even my sister to make. (Note: I realize I make L sound like a drooling, witless loony from time to time, but she’s really a very competent 8th grade teacher with a Masters in math. AND she has wonderful taste in sweaters. It’s a one-two geometry-cable-knit punch.)

Honestly, I was worried about these pancakes at first, because the batter seemed awfully thick, failing to spread in the pan like most other flapjacks. But eight minutes after pouring, there they were: 4” golden discs of spongy goodness, practically begging for maple syrup to soak up. Though the recipe could definitely feed three people, The Boyfriend and I polished off every last bite, and there was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth when we realized there wouldn’t be anymore.

Incidentally, since my Pa is a great lover of pancakes the world over, I plan to make these for Thanksgiving breakfast. Hopefully, they’ll help me reclaim the coveted Favorite Child mantle, a designation bestowed to whichever spawn most endears him/herself to my parents. I haven’t had it since the summer, when L mowed their lawn without being asked. If you’re looking to assume Favorite Child status within your own family, these will definitely do the trick.

P.S. Calculations are provided by Cooking Light, so only the cash math is written out below.

Buttermilk Pancakes
Makes 8 – 10 pancakes
Adapted from Cooking Light.

1 cup all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup low-fat buttermilk
1 teaspoon vegetable oil
1 large egg, lightly beaten
Cooking spray

1) To a large bowl, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. When finished, make an indentation/well in the middle.

2) In a small bowl or large Pyrex glass measuring cup, whisk together buttermilk, oil, and egg.  Pour buttermilk mixture into the flour indentation, and stir until batter is smooth.

3) Now, make those pancakes: pour 1/4 cup batter on a hot griddle or big skillet (nonstick or oiled up). Wait a few minutes. When the side facing up starts bubbling and the sides look set, flip the pancake. Cook until the second side is lightly browned. Serve to a standing O.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
99 calories, 2.9 g fat, $0.10

Calculations
1 cup all-purpose flour: $0.09
2 tablespoons sugar: $0.04
1 teaspoon baking powder: $0.03
½ teaspoon baking soda: $0.01
1/4 teaspoon salt: $0.01
1 cup low-fat buttermilk: $0.49
1 teaspoon vegetable oil: $0.03
1 large egg, lightly beaten: $0.19
Cooking spray: $0.04
TOTAL: $0.93
PER SERVING (TOTAL/9): $0.10