Why Mango Lassis are the Best Ever, or, an Abundance of Mangoes

(You guys! My column today at Serious Eats is on Avocado Chicken Salad. No joke, it’s one of the best things I’ve made this year. Thanks to Mrs. Micah for the idea and The Boyfriend for slurping it up like a team of ravenous little leaguers.)

Last week, I came into possession of two large, ripe mangoes. And let me tell you, folks - there are few things in life greater than receiving mangoes for free. They include, but are not limited to:

• free backrubs
• free concert tickets
• freedom from oppression

Alas, as we were invaded by horrible, six-legged Woody Allen cartoons, it took me awhile to get to the beckoning fruit. Four days after their arrival, they weren’t quite mushy, but had most definitely surpassed the salsa stage. (Meaning the mangoes could be chopped up, but wouldn’t hold their shape very well.)

Here’s the rub: when you search online for mango recipes, 99.9 of the first 100 bazillion are for mango salsa. Once you scroll 14,000 pages past those, there’s a severed link for mango chutney. But never fret. Because if you persevere, you will find, at the very end of the internet, next to an 8-bit porno from 1982 and an ASCII drawing of Homer Simpson, a recipe for mango lassis.

Mango lassis, to put it simply, are THE BEST. An offshoot of the regular lassi (seen here), they’re shake-like and fruity and sweet and filling and positively wonderful. Plus, they have magical powers. Bad things don’t happen when mango lassis are around. To wit:

• If Joss Whedon knew about mango lassis, Buffy wouldn’t have become so weird in the last few seasons.
• If the Hells Angels knew about mango lassis, Altamont would never have happened.
• If Kim Jong-Il knew about mango lassis, North Korea would be a flourishing democratic republic/vacation spot, welcoming of all races and creeds, where nuclear warheads would be used as in-ground swimming pools instead of weapons of mass ouchification.

This mango lassi is a lighter version of the one from the lovely Elise at Simply Recipes. Though it uses milk, you could probably substitute cold water and/or crushed ice based on your preferences. Cardamom is optional, but couldn’t hurt.

In conclusion: mango lassi. Get one.

Mango Lassi
Serves 2
From Simply Recipes.

1 cup lowfat plain yogurt
1/2 cup 1% milk
1 cup chopped mango, peeled and stone removed (about 1 large)
4 teaspoons sugar, to taste
A dash of ground cardamom (optional)

1) Get out a blender. Add  yogurt, milk, mango, sugar, and cardamom. Blend for about 2 minutes, or until everything is smooth and relatively chunk-free. Distribute evenly among your glasses. Serve super-cold.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
190 calories, 2.8 g fat, $0.92

Calculations
1 cup lowfat plain yogurt: 154 calories, 3.9 g fat, $0.70
1/2 cup 1% milk: 53 calories, 1.2 g fat, $0.11
1 cup chopped mango, peeled and stone removed: 107 calories, 0.5 g fat, $0.99
4 teaspoons sugar, to taste: 65 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
TOTAL: 379 calories, 5.6 g fat, $1.83
PER SERVING (TOTAL/2): 190 calories, 2.8 g fat, $0.92